January 10, 2014

After David had finished talking with Saul, Jonathan became one in spirit with David, and he loved him as himself. - 1 Samuel 18:1

Jonathan and David had a very close friendship.  I have always found it remarkable on behalf of Jonathan.  His character has always impressed me greatly.  He was the son of the king and he stood in line to receive the kingdom.  Yet he made a covenant with David (vs 3) and would gladly let David be exalted, instead of working alongside his father Saul, to kill him.  I personally believe that Jonathan was close to God and his discernment led him to know that God was with David and so Jonathan loved him as he loved himself.

Dungy makes some statements that point at me too directly.  "Friendship is meant to have mutual benefits for both people, but we often evaluate others by how they might benefit us."  I have to raise my hand here and admit that I lived far too much of my life as that kind of friend.  At least I feel that way because I feel as though I don't think about what I can do for my friends often enough.  My wife shows me over and over simply through her natural actions and concern for others how I am supposed to be thoughtful towards everyone, especially my friends.

Dungy continues and says, "If you choose your friends simply for the sake of friendship - two-way, mutual benefit - you'll not only have more of them, but the ones you have will mean more to you."  It is important for our kids and ourselves to not get caught up in purposely being friends with someone because of their status or wealth.  Become friends with someone because they are an interesting person and there is a kinship between you.  However, although I like this thought, I am confronted by Jonathan once again.  To what mutual benefit was he seeking in the friendship?  I don't think that is what drove him.  I believe he found someone with a like spirit.  And I believe that this is the most important part of a friendship.