Job - Experiencing Contrast

Just reading through Job and making notes.

Job feels worthless, insecure, and hopeless.  Job feels no reason to continue, he replies, "Although I am blameless, I have no concern for myself; I despise my own life." (9:21)  He feels all his efforts to continue to live are wasted, "I still dread all my sufferings, for I know you will not hold me innocent. Since I am already found guilty, why should I struggle in vain?" (9:28-29)

Job is confused.  While he thanks God for making him and the great times, he still questions why he was even born. "If I am guilty—woe to me! Even if I am innocent, I cannot lift my head, for I am full of shame and drowned in my affliction. ... Why then did you bring me out of the womb? I wish I had died before any eye saw me. If only I had never come into being, or had been carried straight from the womb to the grave!" (10:15,18-19)

Job is embarrassed.  "I have become a laughingstock to my friends, though I called on God and he answered - a mere laughingstock, though righteous and blameless!" (11:4)  Yet, Job has a tremendous faith, "Though he slay me, yet will I hope in Him" (13:15).  Job then wants to confront and demand his trial before God.  He is angry.

But his actions are still blameless, "My face is red with weeping, dark shadows ring my eyes; yet my hands have been free of violence and my prayer is pure." (16:16-17)  And greatest of all, I believe he sees Christ, "Even now my witness is in heaven; my advocate is on high.  My intercessor is my friend as my eyes pour out tears to God; on behalf of a man he pleads with God as one pleads for a friend." (16:19-21)

As best as I can read, Job experienced all the emotions and feelings that go with doing a terrible wrong.  The astounding contrast is that he, as best as I can read, experienced all the emotions and feelings that go with being wronged as an innocent person.  His descriptions of the internal conflict and pain are well said and easy to interpret if you've ever committed a horrendous wrong or been wronged horrendously.  I find myself drawn in as I relate to him and my faith strengthened from his commitment to God in 13:15 and his observance of Christ in 16:19-21.  May I make such a commitment and be reminded of my Intercessor in heaven.