Acts 8

This month our church is reading through the book of Acts.  I've felt compelled on several occasions through my walk to go back and review Acts as this is the story of the very beginnings of the church.  I find it inspiring at how active the Holy Spirit is in the lives of the apostles and confess that I yearn for that same activity.  What prevents the same miracles observed in those days from occurring in my life today?  Two simple things: lack of faith and disobedience. 
Clearly, the Holy Spirit hasn't changed (Mal 3:6).  That same Holy Spirit that is the very essence of God, lives inside of me.  All of the power, knowledge, wisdom, patience, mercy, and love of God is literally inside me.  I don't have to "go to God" or call God into "this place" or look for God.  God is already inside me and waits to come out of me in all of His glory.  I'm convinced He is constantly communicating with me just as He did Philip when He told him to come along side the eunuch.  Yet, I flounder in my walk.  Why?
First I fail to have faith that God is really who He says He is.  I believe that I must fend for myself or take charge of my own career, marriage, hobbies, or even moods.  Yet what does God require?  He requires me to yield my own will to His.  I confess, however, that I struggle to give in.  "God gave me a brain and expects me to use it" the world says.  Or "God gave me common sense and expects me to use it."  And we've all heard "God helps those who help themselves."  I don't any of these in scripture.  What I find is "Seek first the kingdom of God and all these things will be given to you as well."  That is where my disobedience comes in. 
I confess that I'm not singularly focused on the things of God.  I seek pleasure and distraction in activities that may not always honor God.  Don't get me wrong, many activities are not in and of themselves bad, but when we place conditions on God, we are tempted to be unavailable for Him to use when and how He sees fit.  If I set my mind to fishing on Saturday, do I miss the still small voice that says, "you need to serve someone Saturday?"  I believe it happens all too often.
Therefore, I think satan keeps us distracted with all kinds of activities and diversions simply to keep us from the same kind of explosive and miraculous growth in the church that it enjoyed in these early days.  Lord forgive my lack of faith and my lack of attentiveness to you and your calling.  I pray that my agenda is yielded to yours so that I am simply obedient to your calling. I pray for the wisdom and discernment to know your will, the courage and discipline to yield to it, and the patience to follow through in obedience.  Only then will contentment be found.