Weary

Galatians 6:9 Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up.
Dang it!  It happened anyway.  This is my favorite time of year.  The weather is cooler, its football season, hunting season, and the fish are still biting.  Best of all, its the time of year to celebrate my savior's birth!  What a time.  I told myself that this year I was going to take three full weeks off work.  I had hoped to have time to hunt a lot, shop a little, and fill in with quality family time around the fire and a movie.  Well, I've taken the leave from work, but what an incredibly busy time!  It seems I'm busier than ever.  We've watched all of one Christmas movie and Reja addressed Christmas cards while I spent time on Amazon trying to order gifts.  Aagh!
During this time we did take the time to participate in our youth group's annual Children's Christmas Ministry.  During the program the kids from Fresh Start gathered together and sang "Happy Birthday Jesus" and I caught Reja having a Judy Lorenz, "I'm crying my eyes out" moment.  It's then that the message we all know so well sank in. 
We're going about this Christmas thing all wrong.  We're not finding joy in Christmas decorations.  Even with three trees, we are just stressed out about getting the decorating done.  We're not finding joy in Christmas movies - we're not even watching them.  This morning I sought comfort in scripture for a weary heart feeling pulled in way too many directions to enjoy any of them and turned to a familiar passage in Isaiah chapter 40 hoping for a quick fix:
²⁹ He gives strength to the weary
    and increases the power of the weak.
³⁰ Even youths grow tired and weary,
    and young men stumble and fall;
³¹ but those who hope in the Lord
    will renew their strength.
They will soar on wings like eagles;
    they will run and not grow weary,
    they will walk and not be faint.
Then I flipped over to Matthew 11 where I reviewed: “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest."
But like Elijah, I didn't find the voice of the Lord in the obvious.  Instead, God reminded me that joy during this season flows out of His love and he reminded me of the kids singing "Happy Birthday Jesus."  Maybe I'm like Clark Griswald and trying too hard.  Maybe I just need to quit trying so hard, find a ministry and settle into that instead.  I'm not sure I have the courage to tell family that I quit Christmas.  I quit decorating.  I quit exchanging gifts.  I quit going to lame office parties.  I'm afraid I would disappoint everyone and I'm a people-pleaser.  But, I wonder if God is calling us to simplify and get back to what He told us to do - Love Him and love his people. 

PS:  I find it incredibly frustrating that I struggle to buy Christmas presents for almost everyone on my list.  I find my kids easy.  My spouse more difficult because if Reja says she wants something, I just go get it if at all possible and don't wait on the 25th of December.  But others in my family I'm just absolutely uninspired.  So either I lack imagination (certainly true), or I really don't know my family as well as I should (I worry this is true), or my family is spoiled totally rotten and they don't need or want anything (possible).  On the other hand, as I interacted with the kids and their parents at the CCM this year, I felt inspired.  They need mentoring, they need very real needs met, they need opportunities to grow beyond their disadvantaged circumstances.  Perhaps there is a calling herein. 
I've been wondering for some time if Satan's tactic is simply to keep me so busy on the urgent, but relatively unimportant, that I miss God's calling to the truly important in life.  Perhaps I've let satan hijack my most favorite time of year?