I feel old

I feel old physically.  I feel old intellectually.  I feel old spiritually.  It's almost Christmas, the lights are up, almost everything is done, yet I don't have that special awe feeling.  I feel worn out, the opposite of new.

Fairy tales can come true
It can happen to you if you're young at heart (young at heart)
For it's hard, you will find
To be narrow of mind if you're young at heart (young at heart)

And so I forcibly read and listen to songs such as this in order to create in me proper perspective.  But I wonder if it's the curse of remembrance.  When we sin, we remember that sin.  We may have cried our eyes out, we may have worn out the alter rail, we may have full assurance of God's grace to forgiveness, yet we remember that sin and we see the pain in others.  It makes you old. 

When Adam and Eve were kicked out of the garden, they started aging.  Their sin made them old.  Time became a thing at that moment.  When God wanted to destroy the world and then did so while only saving one family, everyone aged differently after that.  The people's sins made them die quicker and age faster.  I know people who look like they're 65 and they're only 45.  Their hard living has aged them quickly.

⁷ At least there is hope for a tree:

    If it is cut down, it will sprout again,
    and its new shoots will not fail.
⁸ Its roots may grow old in the ground
    and its stump die in the soil,
⁹ yet at the scent of water it will bud
    and put forth shoots like a plant.- Job 14:7-9

¹ The Lord is my shepherd, I lack nothing.
² He makes me lie down in green pastures, He leads me beside quiet waters,
³ He refreshes my soul.  - Psalm 23:1-3

Jesus stood and said in a loud voice, “Let anyone who is thirsty come to me and drink.  Whoever believes in me, as Scripture has said, rivers of living water will flow from within them.” - John 7:37-38

Where is the new spring?  It can only come from the living water of Jesus the Savior.  May the old rot and be buried and may the new rise with fresh green leaves, sprouting anew. 

There is always hope because my God lives.  I pray for that resurrection today.